hello God. it's me, margaret (or ann.)

recently i have been struggling.

just with little life stuff and is all adding up.

i feel down, blue, just not myself.

when i think of why, i know exactly why.

recently?  i haven't been taking the time to read my bible DAILY.

but oh wait. i find time to work out 5 days a week before my classes even start.

priorities here are seriously messed up. and i'm having trouble fixing them.

if there is one thing i am certain of, it's that the Word of God never changes.

it is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

it is constant and replicable in every single situation.

it has wisdom and knowledge that i cannot gather everywhere else.

but yet, i have not been reading it.

sure, i read it every couple (or 3 or 4) days.  when i have 'time' or it's convenient.

but the importance of reading every single day is something i cannot stress.

the Bible is the book of LIFE. 

and life is what i'm living....or trying to.

i need accountability, encouragement...something.

i blame this on the fact that i share a room and to pull out my bible and read would be too hard because i'm distracted that there is another person in my room ruffling papers around (and studying for that test i should be studying for. LOL).

when i'm with God, i really need to be with just Him.

it's hard for me to focus when others are around and i know others are watching.

so i make excuses {much like the Biggest Losers.  'no excuses' is their theme this year}

and because i'm not in the Word and with the Lord daily, i feel the consequences.

i feel burdened, down cast, lost, confused, just a bit out of it.

i feel the need for my Savior and the only One who can fill that spot. yet i quench that desire.

(which, by the way, is one of the worst things you can do).

so i feel the emptiness it leaves. and yet don't change it.

so i need to re-prioritize some things.

if that means tomorrow my Bible reading gets done in the morning but NOT my workout, then so be it.

is my physical body going to last?  no sir.

my Spiritual life and relationship is going to be the only eternal thing that matters.

don't store up treasures where moth and thieves destroy.  what is the use?

i hear the analogy at church that putting focus on things in this life is like writing a long paper--10 or 20 pages--and knowing at the end of it that it's not going to be saved.

that would just be silly to keep adding to the document.

why waste your time, energy, efforts and everything on something that won't even save?

well this life is the same way.  nothing here gets saved.

the only thing that does matter is our relationship with the Lord.

and while i know all this, i'm clearly having trouble putting it into practice based off my actions.

so pray for me please. 

that i may change this habit and focus on what truly matters in life.

i want to live completely for Him.  and need to pursue Him with ALL i have.