convictions of a college student

today i had my last bit of babysitting for the summer.

weird, huh? super bitter sweet. as hard as it is, i know i'll miss it like crazy.

today the kids made me some pics to put in my room at school!  

then, tonight was the womens b.s. and it was great.

we discussed miriam--and i realized i did not know much of anything about her!  

what an amazing woman of God who totally dealt with jealousy and other human emotions.

lindsay, (her sis) kelsi, cassie, and i all stayed late and had some ice cream with chocolate syrup. friends who eat together, stay together!

so at church on sunday, i had a convo with 2 moms.

one is the mom of a friend i graduated with {mrs. hosler} and the other i had just met {sean--brooks mom actually!}

well we got to talking and i was asking about olivia h. and her mom said 'well....we don't see her much'.

and somehow, we got on a convo about being a college student and how parents often feel we only come home when we want something.  and that they expect to see us tons when we're home, and then get disappointed when they dont see it. and how they feel they give and give and give....yet give nothing (but they both clarified that they know part of their job is to give with a joyful heart). 

now i know this seems like common sense. but for some reason, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

all this time i feel i've been a horrible daughter. never caring about much and only taking.

and i felt HORRIBLE. like, instantly felt convicted and knew i was supposed to hear this very thought.

yes, my mom and i struggle so much. 

but how much does she give for me? everything. 

and here i work all the time and then am out at bible studies and other events on my 'spare' time.

little of that is given to my family. and how sad is that?

i know i mean a lot to my parents, but hearing it changed everything.

hearing that we still do have a part of our parent's hearts and they still care so much....wow. my parents don't say that much. maybe that why i have continued going on the way i do.

but i want to encourage//challenge other college students--and challenge myself.

be attentative to our parents.

i made it a point to go on a walk with my mom that night. i was tired and didn't want to, but knew it would mean more than anything.

i know it's late in the summer (and almost 21 years late), but better late than never.

i'm trying to make more time for my mom this week. wish me luck!