my bad heart and a great song.

its a good thing i am no longer contageous, because 2 days in the house has been enough.

i dont know why, but these days have been rough.

when i told my parents that i wasn't babysitting because of my pink eye, it must have come out as:

"i am home to be your chauffeur and errand runner."

because that's all i have done!

and can i be honest?

i have a really bad attitude and heart about it.

i get so angry when they ask me to drive daniel somewhere.

why?!

why do i care if i can help out and be a blessing?

i know why. becuase i have been praying about being more helpful and a blessing at home.

so, naturally, i am going to be tested in that department.

and right now i think i am failing.

with a big fat  F.

in my head i say that i am going to be polite the next time and just say yes.

then they ask me something and i get all: 'ugggg i guess.'

just like that. with attitude and all.

i even did the eye rolling thing earlier--don't worry, my mother quickly called me out on that.

i guess i find it frustrating that my mother is doing things around the house and i have to go pick up her child.

i know it helps her out a ton but that's how i justify my bad heart.

she said earlier that she was busy working and that's why i needed to drive daniel.

um, she's been flipping painting all day.

{which looks great, might i add}

but she hasn't been working.

i know i am not really sick, but i will say my energy level is very low.

so the last thing i want to be doing is running my bro all over God's green earth.

but i just wish my heart wasn't so nasty about it.

the more i pray about it, the worse i feel it gets.

i really need to work in this area!

i have been obsessed with this song and video.

please take the time to listen to it.

such powerful words:

'i may be weak, but Your Spirit strong in me.

my flesh may fail, but my God, You never will.'

'i need you. to soften my heart, break me apart. i need you to open my eyes and see that You're shaping my life. all i am, i surrended.'

my prayer is that i can live out these words to the fullest.

and be a huge blessing to my family.

because they are such a blessing to me.

wanna know the worst part about pink eye?!

having to buy new make-up!

i spent $50 on new make up....HOW is that possible?!

had a bible study at church tonight and i really enjoyed it.

went with liv and marie and am hoping to be able to go through the summer.

off to babysit for the first time this week!

hope this goes good and i don't lose my mind!

goodnight, world.