lots of word vomit.

wow.  been a long couple of days, to say the least.

saturday i babysat for a fam from DC at a hotel.

after babysitting 50 hrs i ended the night lying on the floor, in the pitch black on the verge of tears.  just wanting the parents to come home.  

cause, you know, i was in the pitch black so i wouldn't wake up the kids.

and my eyes were so tired i got to a point where i couldn't read in the bathroom any longer.

but sunday was so fun.

corey had a bday cookout and there was SO much fun going on.

some sand volley ball, some cake pops {that i made and they were DELICIOUS!}, and lots of picture taking.

{umm aren't they the most adorable sister pair?!}

{i love these women!}

{probably my favorite shot.  get it jeremiah!}

{we told her to put her face in the cupcake.....so she did.  how adorable?!}

{how precious.}

{i couldn't resist!}

{i love lindsay so much!}

{super mom! and with other peoples kids, too!}

{love my liv}

{and the three cutest little ladies around!}

it was such a good time and i hope to do it again soon.

but afterwards, i ended up in the parking lot for over an hour and a half with mitch.

just talking about life, the 5 love languages, and whatnot.

and like a typical interaction, i hadn't talked to him in a couple weeks.

then we have a great time.  sooo typical.

backup: when i had walked into church that morning i was SO excited that i feel i am totally fine just being friends--i knew this because i didn't want to talk to him in the way i had before. and we all know that way!

i've been praying a lot about it and know that these feelings can be removed if they aren't supposed to be here. so naturally, when i get to that point, this happens.  and i feel a little confused again haha.

it was such a good time.  and we didn't leave till after 11.

so today?  i was a bit tired.  and by a bit, i mean a LOT.
and yes.  he did txt me tonight. oh, brother.

but now i'm super tired and need to rest. 

the kids were good today and it was such an easy day.

had a good water balloon fight and got some good pics on rach's camera.

speaking of rachels, rach w is in africa.  got word from her and they are safe!

but she has no luggage.  so pray for luggage soon and God to work through them.

whew.  i'm done.

happy monday. starting the week off exhausted is NOT a good thing!

what 20 year old still gets nightmares?!

last night i slept horribly! 

i had a nightmare last night and was awake from 3-4 am.

it was totally stupid but it was real to me!!

it was something lame about the house that i house sit for getting trashed while i was watching their house. and these guys were jerks and no one was helping me call the police to bust the party {for some reason i couldn't call the police?}. 

there is more to it but i'll spare it.

then the dogs got me up at 6 am to go out.  yikes!

but i had a great rainy run with liv and lindsay.

it poured and we were dripping water.  but it was fun, too :].

at one point linds said: 'i can't tell if i'm sweating. i mean, i know i am, but i can't distinguish between the two!'

i walk in and this is who i see.

hello my little cuteness!

who, by the way, turns one tomorrow.

i can't believe this time last year i was watching the boys while rach was in labor. 

then at wendy's today, a group os gorgeous guys were beside us.

so i said to rory: 'those guys are cute!'

to which he applies: 'do you want one of them to be your boyfriend?!'

so jokingly i said: 'yes!'

he then tells me to just go over and ask them. 

hahaha!  oh i love that kid.

yes, rory is licking her arm.

that little punk.

we went bowling and i dominated. 111 baby.
i guess i should mention we had bumpers haha.

i am so tired and its only 8.

oi vei!

OH! today i signed up for the Warrior Dash in september.

you have no clue how excited i am for it.

julia, joe and others are going to run with me.  it will be awesome.

when agreeing to partake, warning 1 reads as the following:

'I understand that entering Warrior Dash is a hazardous activity.'

get excited! 

and it's the weekend.  

oh, thank you, Jesus, that it is the weekend!

blessings in disguise.

well i thought i would never make it through today.

i woke up exhausted and had a long day ahead of me.

not a good place to be in.  but have no fear!  i survived!

i had to keep reminding myself that it was going to be a good day, and i had the ability to make it just that.

and it ended up being fine by the end of the day!

we had a water balloon fight and it was fun.

ava asked me today why i had so many bug bites on my back....and neck.
i didn't have the heart to tell her it is acne.
but my point exactly why i started an acne medicine this week.

then i had another bike ride tonight. and it was glorious.

sometimes, when riding, i just can't help but marvel at the beauty of creation.

have you ever stopped and looked?  like really looked?

the grass, sky, clouds.  it's amazing.

and even more amazing that the creator of that made me. 

little, silly, ole me.

and if He cares about that piece of grass and tree, how much more He cares for me.

it honestly blows my mind sometimes. and i know i don't take enough time to marvel at it all.

so take time tomorrow to marvel at it all.

cause you never know when it will all be taken from us--or altered in a way we're not able to enjoy it like we could.

i heard this song in the car and just fell in love.

how God has been teaching me about waiting, and the fact that things might not go the way i want {or think they will go}. but it is all for HIS plan...not mine. 

and how things can feel so horrible at the time, only later to be seen the real meaning behind it all.

sometimes we don't have the privilege of seeing why tough times happen, but one day, we will.

He hears. even when it seems He doesn't.

i hope you enjoyed as much as i did.

makes me feel a bit more relaxed at the uncertainly of it all.

happy thursday..the weekend is so close!

give me a little motivation and i'll look good.

today was a let down.

we had plans to go to the cinci zoo....but then didn't.

rach was overwhelmed with the house and needed to pick up.

bummer.  maybe next week!

needless to say, she was a bit frazzled and i feel i did a good job of lightening the mood.

had a good bike ride this morning while listening to hillsong united.

i nearly died when i saw a dead frog on the bike path!  gross.

but, we spent some time at the library and outside.

i couldn't decide if i liked the b&w or color.  i think b&w.

notice how i actually tried to look good today.  

that's what happens when you tell me we're going to the zoo!!  haha. i feel like that is sad that i am at the point where i need motivation to look good.

it was a bit of a long day but we got through it.

can i mention that in 2 short weeks i'll be beach bound?!

yeah...i can't wait.

it won't necessarily be a 'vacation' but it will be the beach.

so i'll take it!

got to talk to my 'sweet-ie' rach for a whopping 1.5 hours.

how i have missed that girl!

i love that we are both in the same spot in our lives.

single but wouldn't be single still if we had planned out lives.

but funny thing...we don't plan our lives. so we sit and wait!

i can't wait to see her soon. like real soon.

less than 2 months and i'll be back at school.

excuse me, i need to go cry now.

the thought still makes me depressed.

and p.s....the 13 year old i sit for is now a woman.

if you know what i mean?

can't believe it. i remember the day i had that convo with my mom/girls at school.  when i told my bestie, erika, at the time she was SO excited {she started when she was 10 so by the 8th grade when i started, she couldn't believe it took me so long!}.

and i remember another girl {mary clare} asked me why we were excited.

so i did what any insecure 8th grader would do.

i lied and said it was because this boy i liked {miles} talked to me that morning.  why i didn't want her to know?  who knows!

and i feel really bad, still, about lying about it.

oh am i glad i don't have to be in MS again :].

waffle face.

today was a really good day. and i feel my summer is flying by!

this morning, i made a vow that it was going to be a good day.

so this morning, ava started cutting holes in her pancakes and looking out through them.

so i thought 'we need a picture!'

and i remembered that i can use my phone self-time...score!

needless to say...we spend a while taking pics.

someone would eat their items {thinking we were done}, and i would make more for more pics.

we went through lots of pancakes and waffles.  but we ate every last one--no wasting here. and it was totally worth it.

{first with our pancakes}

{now waffles. i think we all look a bit like spiderman...see the resemblance?}

i txted stacy the pic of us three, and she loved it!

she even showed it to her outpatient today when she received it.

they are such a blessing and i will miss them so so much.

my time with them is dwindling down. let's not think about it, mkay?

my bestie rachel left for africa today!

she called from the airport and i had the kids say goodbye.

and all day long they kept playing with animals saying they were from africa. {and ryan even was going around pretending he was from africa.}

how adorable is that!

and she told me she PASSED her NCLEX!  how awesome is that?!

i couldn't be more proud!

i know i'll be praying for safety for her team, for them to do amazing work for the kingdom, and for God to show Himself to her in ways she could never imagine! 

i know i can't wait to hear all about her trip when she returns :].

{although i will just be getting on my vaca so i'm hoping to be able to have a bit of time to chat with her.}

tomorrow means we're half way through the week already.

now, that's a good feeling!

library and prickly legs

today was just another day.

got up and worked out and did some weight lifting. and i'll tell ya, my arms HURT.

like, they hurt when i pick up water to drink. yeah, that kinda hurt.

but it was so good to work out!

then i babysat with the boys.

we went to the library {saw april and kids}, went on a walk and hung out.

at one point aidan turns to me and says:

'ann, do you have splinters on your legs?"

i was kinda confused for a while.  then i realized. he was talking about my prickly legs!

so i said: 'nope..i just haven't shaved in a while!'

oh the things kids come up with!

heard from my bf {but i guess i use that term lightly?} today for the first time in a while.

remember...haven't seen her since thanksgiving.

we got in a little tiff the other night because she has been really busy, which is totally fine, but is spending most of the summer out of town. so when she is home, it's rare.

well, she just hasn't been making seeing me a priority.

and that's fine, it's just a bit annoying and honestly...hurtful.

so the other night she txted me super late and said she was leaving the next day. so i responded and told her i was a bit hurt that i wasn't near the priority list to see her and that i would hope to see her when she gets back from chili {which will be sometime in january}.

i'm not mad at all.  i just wish she cared to see me as much as i care to see her.

now i'm BEAT and ready for bed. but it's not quite 9.

bachelorette is on tonight!  but i'm not too thrilled about her.

so i don't know if i'll let my sleep win tonight. i just might.

and here is a pic from me and aly the other night.
she is recovering wonderfully and no longer has the thing on her nose :].
love this little lady with all my heart!

{and a silly one, of course!}

well, happy monday!

another week begins.

another sunday to love my dad.

today was just another sunday.

church, nursery.  chilling.

went to brew's with my mom, dad and their friends donna and bill.

they are super nice and it was fun to see them.

then i tried to make cake pops tonight and it went OK.  still got LOTS of perfecting to do!

last night i house sat and stayed the night there.  

they live in the country and man its SCARY at night!

today there was an AWESOME father's day sermon and i wish every man my age heard it.

it was just so dead on about how to be a Godly man.

go to VGF website and listen.....just do it.

not to mention, i learned the Joseph, Jesus' dad, doesn't say ONE word in the bible.

who knew!?

met a new friend, james, at church today.

i love meeting new friends!

and since it's fathers day, i better mention my daddy-o.

i love him oh so much!

yes, we have a tough time and don't always click or understand each other.

i get really snippy to him and act all moody...and he still puts up with me.

i'm his baby girl. and although i don't pull that card much, when i need it, it's there.

he sure knows how to spoil me when i ask {so i just don't ask, unless its urgent!}

but i know whole heartedly that God has him as my dad for a reason.

yes, its hard to not get irritated that my dad doesn't have this quality or that, but he's still my dad.

and no one ever will be able to have that spot.

they say it's so easy to be irritated at your family, and i know i show that side to him more than most people. but he still provides for me and is always a phone call away.

i get a lot of my qualities from him {like not being a morning person!} and some of my outgoing-ness. and he likes to make people happy--i do too!

they all did father's day dinner last night but i was babysitting and couldn't go.

ugh, go figure.

but i did make him a yummy desert, so that counts for something, right?

dad, thank you for all you have done for me the last 20+ years.

i know i don't show you the love for you that i should.

you are so special to me and i hope to have you around much longer.

you took me to take my drivers test, you were there for school dances.

you were there are tons of field hockey games and cheering events.

you offered such great athletic advice, none of which i wanted at the time {cause we had usually just lost a game!}

you used to play 'hail-a-taxes' at night with us and get us all wound up before bed--mom always hated that! but we'll remember it forever.

i look forward to the day you can give permission for someone to have my hand and when you get to walk me down the aisle. and the day that you get to see your grandkids. i can't wait to share all those moments with my daddy-o. you have taught me so much, and for all of it, i am grateful.

as i pray that our relationship becomes stronger, and i know that eventually when i mature some more, it will.

thanks for being patient with me and allowing me to be me.

not many people let me be who i really am. and that is worth more to me than anything in the entire world.

 thanks for being my dad. i love you!

the closest thing i have to a lil sis.

tonight i spent severals with my favorite 12 year old, aly.

she had a deviated septum and had surgery yesterday to get it fixed.
she is recovering fabulously and looks great.
can't blow her nose for a week but is fine otherwise.
i'm so surprised she is hanging in there so well! 
i pray she keeps recovering really fast.

she got home today, and i went over and chilled with her {and used some nursing skills!}

she is such a sweetheart and more of a little sister than anything.

i have always wanted a little sister. but one that's way younger. like aly.

today, i had coffee with a friend katie {we're birthday buddies} and then babysat.

it was a looong day and i am not looking forward to this weekend.

house sitting and babysitting.  i. need. a. break.
funny how i say this but yet last weekend i had nothing to do..and was bored.
where's the happy medium!?

but it's all good.

took some pics with aly and she will send them to me soon. then i will share :].

i need sleep. so off i go.

happy FRIDAY! the weekend is here!

singing in the rain.

today was such an easy day.  

had all three kids sleeping for a good chunk of the afternoon and had to wake them up.

then, once away, it started raining.

so i suggested that we play in the rain, and they loved the idea!

so we ventured out.  then in rain boots and umbrellas, myself in my tank top and bare feet.

{i didn't have extra clothes so was trying to minimize the clothes i got wet}

i was going to wear my bra but didn't know if that was appropriate??

at one point, we went to get the mail and half way to the mail box it started pouring!

so we all ran back.

but we were making great memories together. 

{look at them...all cute!}

{ava wouldn't get in the pic with us}

things were going really good...till ryan jumped in a puddle and fell.

he busted open a previous wound and you would have thought the world had ended.

so i got him all dr. up, with a popsicle, and he was good.

and of course i got a pic of him falling.

i was trying to get one of them jumping, but since my camera phone is so slow this is what i got:

{poor little guy!}

then i went to run errands with emily c. we had a good time but i'm exhausted.

this whole 'trying to be a morning person' is getting rough!!

good news: the car was able to be fixed for a whopping $60.

bad news: this kills my chances of a new car.

which by the way, my mom this morning suggested i get a lease and she would co-sign.  those are two things my mom is SUPER against.

i knew it was God speaking through her {and i attribute it to the fact that i have been praying for a car}.

gah...we will see!

smoking....on the side of the road.

well today was an interesting day.

babysitting went good and then i went to the HS youth group.

guess who was leading worship....yeah.  not ideal.

it was good and i was really intimidated to be with other HS girls.

partially cause i look like one and so they probably don't see me as a leader.

i am still praying about it cause maybe it is a good kind of intimidation and good to be out of my comfort zone.  

then, on the way home from church, my car starts SMOKING like crazy from the hood.  and it won't accelerate.

i had NO clue what to do.  so i call mom and dad. and no one answers.

of course, the one time that i actually need someone.

no neighbors picked up.  no one. 

so i am thinking of people who are coming back from church since they will be heading that way.

so i call mitch.  cause who else was i to call!?

well, he of course, didn't pick up either.

and he was awkward tonight, btw.

so i call my oldest brother bobby {who is in columbus} cause i had no clue what to do!

so he tells me to get out of the car and my sister in law calls her parents, who willingly came to my rescue.

thank the Lord for in-law's parents!

mitch eventually called me back and had to take someone home so he was on his way, but i told him it was taken care of. 

well he called when i was on the way home and he was behind my car.

i'm glad he came but it was kinda embarrassing at the same time!

he asked if i needed to go with him to cool off the engine but i told him i was good.

talk about a humbling experience.

oh, and guess who was home the whole time?  my parents!

ugh!  at least it was kinda a fun adventure.

this morning i had coffee with brook and we had a great time.

talked for 2 hours and i had to cut the convo short to bbsit.

i can't wait to talk to her more soon!

now i'm just embarrassed and feel horrible that the car is a goner.

and as i txt mitch to say i'm sorry, he replies with a bunch of 'it's ok, friend!' and 'that's what friends are for' stuff.

ok ok...i'm getting the point.

oh and i got to talk to jane tonight. she is awesome.

and she has some boy excitement going on so it was fun to be filled in.

she is such an amazing woman of God and i really look forward to getting to know her more really really soon.

i really need a new car!  like, my own car.

i'm praying God provides a miracle.

especially since i am to house sit for a family in the next couple weeks. yikes!

no i'm off to bed.  long day ahead tomorrow!

we're half way through the week.  after tonight, such a bitter feeling. 

i don't want days to go on cause i have no car.  sad day.

i don't want to go back to school.

today was the easiest babysitting day i've had in a while.

practially had 1 kid the whole day.

either one was sleeping, at VBS.  i had all three for a couple hours at the end but no biggie.

we even made brownies {which i bribed them with all day haha}

{we all know the best part of baking is licking the bowl!}

then i had the womans bible study and i cannot even tell you how thankful i am for them.

i know i say it a lot but they have been a huge blessing.

lindsay was even talking about how she is not wanting liv and i to go back to school.

i told her i was already depressed about it, too.

and speaking of, john {the pastor} and i got into a discussion about depression.

he asked if i was a good kid...whatever that means.

so we got into a discussion, and then he asked me if i am always so up-beat.

i said 'yes'...but felt kinda convicted. cause you know what?  when my seasonal depression comes i'm not like this.  at all. 

but why didn't i say anything?  cause there were about 6 people around.

and i am so bummed at myself that i didn't say anything cause i feel God has been telling me to be more open about the topic.

but i was embarrassed.  so i went up to him at the end and told him i struggle with that and felt bad for not saying something earlier.  so we talked a bit about it, and it was nice.

it was so nice to talk with someone who was understanding.

i really wish i had the opportunity to get to know him more.  but i know he is a busy busy man.

one thing John did was ask me if i have prayed for healing from depression.
and i have never even thought about it.  how stupid could i be?!
so now i am going to pray that God takes it away.  and if he does, awesome.  if not, God is still good and will give me the strength to get through.

anyways, i am going to miss this bunch so very badly in the fall. 

i just want to spend so much time with them NOW. but know that is hard to do.

i only have 8 weeks left when i'm home....how depressing is that!

i am hoping for a good day tomorrow with the kiddos.

it's tuesday...almost half way done with the week!

amazing night of adventures {picture edition}.

well last night i shared a little about my night. and now i can't wait to share more.

in fact, i am not even going to blog about today cause i'm guaranteeing it won't even come close to yesterdays events.

there will be lots of pics, so bear with me!

it all started going to church with my sister!  yay.

but church was totally different in the morning.  the Spirit was working!

which is great.  but of course that would happen the day i brought a guest.

so i told her she would have to come back again when it was normal. she said she would!

then, liv, corey, jeremiah, mitch and i went to lunch at Ruby Tuesdays.

i had never been there before and it was pretty good. 

i invited mitch, not expecting him to come.  but am glad he did.

it was a BLAST and we had some really good laughs.

but the second mitch left, jeremiah and corey ask if i am in love.

ummmm what! totally embarrassed! i said no and that we're friends.

i guess i must have been flirting with him?  kelly and liv said i wasn't making it obvious but we'll see.

then i told corey on the way out that we were friends and i don't know him well enough to know if i like him.  he responded with: 'not yet'. and asked if i would go on a date with mitch and i said probably.  i have a feeling i shared too much information.

then went to chairs and met two new friends: chris and keri. they are super nice!

we finished in 15 minutes.  which is a record of some sort, we're certain!

then, amanda and i went to mitch's grad part {along with many other people}.

had an awesome time.  played some frisbee, corn hole, ate good pizza.  what a success.

then, almost all of us went to whit's for custard. 

leona, brook, mitch and i all rode together.

had a super great time!

then, they got some custard for jane.  so we took it to her at olive garden.

{photos of us in the car, on the way to see jane}

{i thought our silhouettes were cool!}

 {allll smiles!}

 {and some silly faces.}

 {and another crazy one}

we gave jane her milkshake thing and she was so happy.

she even commented on how mitch didn't match, and if he really wore that to his grad party--which he did.

gotta love siblings!

but she is so sweet.  i really hope to get to know her more.

and of course we took pictures in the parking lot.

i dont know what they are doing here.  but i thought it fit everyones character haha.

 {nothing like olive garden.  and pictures in the parking lot}

{i think this is the sweetest picture. mitch and george. bffs}

then, we get back to the catering place and mitch's car won't start. he has no gas.

oh, and neither does brook {her car starts, but her gas light has been on.}

so i drive brook and mitch to mitch's house to get gasoline cans.  from there we head to speedway!

once we get gas {and spend a whopping $20 on 5.8 ish gallons} we head back to where the cars are.

then, we fill the cars with gas and take plenty more pictures.

{we're pross!}

 {apparentally he didn't trust me to fill his car.  it was my first time so i don't blame him!}

 {notice mitch's adams apple.  george was commenting on how big it was haha. and look closely, mitch's hand is on my back.}

 {can i say i LOVE this woman!!  such a beautiful woman!}

so of course mitch left the gas can in my car, so i brought it to his house on my way home.

well we stood and talked for 15 ish minutes.

he again told me how everyone loves me, including his sister {which takes me up many notches in his book he said}. he was impressed with how well i meshed with everyone and i am so thankful for his compliments.  the people at church have been beyond amazing and i can't take credit for that!

had such a fun night and can't wait to have many more nights like this!

then i had a nice long hour convo with amanda. 

all along finding out that everyone at the church is also telling mitch to like me.

which honestly?  makes me embarrassed.  cause i don't want to make it awkward between us.

but our convo consisted of her telling me i needing to guard my heart. and i trust her more than anything. 

so now i sit here and pray even MORE cause i don't want to get involved when all that is going to happen is that i'll get my heart hurt. i don't want to get let down. 

so now i'm all perplexed and just a bit discouraged that the destiny of all this is probably going that direction.

but i am glad someone can warn me. and i will be praying that he can mature a bit and see how he has hurt women's hearts by being nice. i pray that God brings a woman that will stop that so he can glorify God even more.

oh.....backtrack a bit--to top the night off,  after filling up his car, mitch drove us down the hill to our cars {which were about 30 seconds walk away, if that}

so naturally, we took one more picture.

{an end to the night, and a 'see you soon' to the new adventures ahead!}

God is so good!  i can't wait to get coffee with brook this week. 

got up and ran with liv and lindsay this morning and we had such a good time.

i love those women more than anything!

babysitting today went good. i'm frustrated beyond belief but only 8 more weeks.  yes, i did count today, it was that frustrating.

but rachel said she would come to church with me in the next couple weeks.  YAYYY!!  hope that all works out!

now i'm beat and ready to go to bed. it's only 8:37.

adios, and happy monday!